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Calculus is one of those things that comes to you in bits. Intuitive understanding can't be forced. Just keep going...
By the way, the calculus isn't what kills ya, it's the algebra used to simplify the expressions and equations. Holy gods!
At least that is what I remember. I avoid calculsu whenever physcially possilbe! I guess that is why I am not an engineer. LOL
Wait.....no ...it's okay, this doesnt take calculus!
Also, I've often likened integration with conjugation...just to give you an idea of how hard I find it.
You survived for years of engineering school! You've got moxy my friend and brains to match.
I was a computer science major for three years after coming out of the navy. I changed my major almost all the way through, based on my inability to think spacially. I was fine with logic, but probability, combinational mathematics or calculus involving moving objects or changing states killed me. I'm much happier with concepts related to the humanities. Also, I'm good communicating, teaching and interacting. Guess that was lucky for me that I discovered that eventually. I would spend hours in the lab, come out with a finished, working piece of software, but a whopper of a migraine. I programmed at a snails pace. I had a good GPA, but slowly had to come to realization that I did NOT have the intellect to be a good software engineer. I'm okay with that, it was just a hard thing to admit at the time. I did come out with a great background in mathematics that I use every day helping the high school kids I work with.